A true story.
There is a silent super power that some could call intuition, some would call pattern recognition and some may even call claircognizance. Some may also call their experience of it an anxiety involving trait that keeps them overthinking every social interaction.
You may have it if you focus carefully…
It’s the ability to see in others what your own lived experience has been.
Let’s go back in time to 1991, the Sunnyboys were cold, the metal slides were scorching, the hair fringes were blunt, the hairbands were thick sparkly plastic.
I was 4 years old in adorable denim overalls, a rhinestone bedazzled tee, white ruffle socks and…. I was speechless.
Literally. I was very late to the talking milestone. Family violence and trauma will do that to you. (Don’t worry I have absolutely made up for it - your girl loves a chat now).
My siblings spoke for me. Adults spoke for me. I used gestures and pointed to things like a very frustrated toddler would. Schools recommended speech pathology for me. Although not deaf, the terror I felt resulted in silence.
Fast forward to now. The iced coffee is large, the bilateral stimulating focus music is loud and the Gorman prints are colourful in my millennial mum wardrobe.
And for the past decade I have quietly noticed the children who speak a lot, a little, fast or soft, too loud or not at all. I notice the ones who can talk but look like they have a frog caught in their throat. The ones who use pitch, intensity and volume but never feel heard.
My experience of traumatic speechlessness lead me to be honoured by the Deaf community to teach mindfulness.
To use baby sign language with our two under two (holy moly that was a noisy era of life!).
I respectfully use Auslan sign language and symbolic representations of connection with children in therapy who were also speechless due to trauma or emotional dysregulation.
Because holding two hands over your heart to a child to remind them they are safe and not alone, is more powerful then trying to convince them with big fancy words.
Because saying ‘I love you’ in Auslan at school drop off is a silently powerful symbol of safety in a child’s mind.
So, short story long, remember that your quiet gestures can carry the loudest love and your pattern recognition can be used for the greater good.
